Director: Stephen Sommers
Starring: Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, and Dennis Quaid
Released: 2009
Box Office: $150,167,630 (USA)
Throwback Review
G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra takes place in the near future where weapons master James McCullen (Christopher Eccelston) has created a weapon capable of destroying a city. He has utilized a new chemical weapon called nanotech to create four warheads through his company M.A.R.S. and sells them to NATO. NATO troops led by American soldiers Duke (Tatum) and Ripcord (Wayans) who are to deliver the warheads but their convoy is ambushed by the Baroness (Sienna Miller) and a group of unknown soldiers. Duke recognizes the Baroness to be his ex-fiancee Ana Lewis and neither are able to kill the other. He (along with Ripcord) are rescued by a group of elite soldiers, including Scarlett (Rachel Nichols), Snake Eyes (Ray Park), Breaker (Said Taghmaoui), and Heavy Duty (Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje) and they are taken to the G.I. Joe base. There they meet General Hawk (Quaid) who reluctantly lets them join his team.
With the aid of the Doctor (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), McCullen plans to use the nanotechnology to build an army of soldiers. They plan to use the warheads as a way to create chaos that will result in a new world order, led by M.A.R.S. The Joes work together to try and stop McCullen while Duke also tries to save Ana (The Baroness).
The film is weak. It's not awful, but it is weak. The storyline isn't bad - it's just so far from the original G.I. Joe franchise. This is what makes the film so laughable to most audiences and critics. I understand where the makers of the film were coming from; they wanted to maintain that G.I. Joe mentality but update their devices and foes to make them more relevant to the current film industry that is filled with high-tech action movies. But by doing that, they lost all of the charm and nostalgia from the original series and even the toys that people grew up on.
The cast was pretty good. Quaid, Gordon-Levitt and Eccelston were the obvious strong points of this cast, with Gordon-Levitt "commanding" the screen with each scene he was in. Eccelston is a fantastic villain but was given barely anything to work with. The rest of the cast were decent but nothing remarkable. Tatum was purely eye-candy in this role and Wayans was clearly included for comedic relief (which he provided in spades). The rest of the cast? Forgettable.
Final Verdict: Skip it. Only marginally better than the latest film in the franchise and a little long, especially with the weak storyline and lackluster cast. If you're feeling nostaglic, want to hear some classic G.I. Joe lines (Quaid gets to say the line "...and knowing is half the battle") and are in the mood for a mindless action film, this is good choice. But don't expect it to be on par with the other action films of this generation. It's more like the cheesy-ness of Battleship but tries to be like Transformers. After watching the latest G.I. Joe film, you'll be wishing the makers stuck with the format used in this film.
Rotten Tomatoes
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